Motorcycle Kids

and the price of gas

So my dear internets I’m sure I don’t need to tell you how expensive gas is, y’all know. Now due to the price lots of people have switched to riding motorcycles, which is working well for them here these days as we have no rain to worry about. Oh did I mention that motorcycles are cheaper than cars or trucks and AND the insurance on them is way cheaper too.

No I have not gone out and gotten a bike, although no, no, but I have been seeing women riding driving them and they seem very pleased. Oh I know some of y’all are hard fast believers that it’s a man’s vehicle, but I’m one of those people that believe If a man can do it, So can a woman. That’s not to say I that I think they should. Hey don’t shoot me. I think that there are some things that men can do easier, maybe even better, because they are physically built for it and likewise for women.

But back to the motorcycles, when an accident happens with a bike, it is serious even little spills can be very serious. That is why riders should wear helmets. Helmets keep the brains off the pavement. NO! I am not gonna get in a helmets / no helmets argument with y’all, it’s my opinion and as I guess I have to remind y’all…This here is Paradise Valley and WE are the Queen and we may speak as we please, without any back talk comments.

Why am I posting about this, I’m sure you are wondering…Well let me show you (I know blurry, but we were all going about 55 MPH)

 See, the driver has no helmet the rider has no helmet, heck she is even wearing a skirt. Which truthfully is what caught my eye the other day anyway. LOL No her skirt didn’t go flying up, that would have been funny (for moi). But No NO NO -- it was the little thing she had between her legs that upset me. Oh here is a cropped in view.

Can y’all, my dear internets, see that? The little bare knee sticking up, the hand gripped onto the driver’s black leather vest.

Is this legal?

Prior to September 1, 2009 there was no minimum age, height or weight requirement. HB537 passed in the 81st Legislative Session and it requires a passenger be at least five years old. No changes were made to helmet requirements: if under 21 years old a passenger must still wear a helmet, if over 21 years old a passenger can ride without a helmet if the driver meets the helmet exemption requirements.

For more information on passengers, visit: Texas Transportation Code and read Chapter 545 Section 416.

For more information on the helmet law and exemptions, visit: Texas Transportaion Code and read Chapter 661 Section 003.

Yes I was horrified! Yes the child appeared to have a helmet on…

But it sure looked like a Bicycle helmet and NOT a motorcycle helmet to me. And just an FYI you can only have 1 passenger legally on a motorcycle

Oh well, I guess children are replaceable. Right?

Saint Patrick

As if I needed to tell y’all that yesterday was Saint Patrick’s Day. Funny thing about that is the world always seems to think it is Irish on Saint Patrick's Day. Now that’s funny…a Green Earth…hum I may be on to something.


That St. Patty was something else, I mean he chased all the snakes outta Ireland and I think they all came to Texas, well at least they always seem to fine me, but this is NOT a snake story! Really it’s not.

Last weekend we took a trip to Glen Rose Texas. This little town has the Paluxy River going though it and if you don’t know that it is a very special river. Granted it’s not the Rio Grande, whose gently rolling waters thinly separate Texas from Mexico, but nonetheless the Paluxy River in Glen Rose has a gia-norm-mas history…

Ya see in and around the river are Dinosaur tracks.

They are pretty cool to see in real life and our visit to the State Park would have perfect if had not been for all the people. No really they and their noisy kids were all over the tracks, poking them with sticks chunking rocks at them. What is up with people? Didn’t they get the memo that this is a Green Earth? And that once this type of thing is destroyed there is no mulligan no getting a second chance. So what I’m trying to say is IF y’all have not been to Glen Rose Texas to see the Dinosaur tracks and you were planning to go don’t wait too long. Bare (yea the naked kind) in mind that there is not much in Glen Rose except the tracks. Oh and they are in a state park so there is an entrance fee.

Also please note the missing tooth of this poor fellow…I think some rotten people got stuck between his teeth.


Now back to the previously mentioned St. Patty’s Day...We went to Glen Rose for a Festival, where there were some: runs, motorcycles, craft booths, kids' jumper thingies, bean cookers, music but hardly anyone wearing green and dagnabit no leprechauns! I miss Ireland, the real county with stout cows and rolling green hills, mossy green truf, crazya$$ed golf guys, crumbling castles and tons of red headed peoples including the lucky gold carrying leprechauns…the land of my ancestors


Please pass me a green beer and kiss me I’m Irish even after Saint Patrick’s Day.

Shutter the Door

Y’all remember when I talked about painting the shutters and front door? I’m sure you do after all y’all don’t have anything else to remember right? Just junk about moi, such is the life of this Queen of this Paradise Valley not 2 mention Hell’s Mountain.


Member? I said that some other stupid people on my street went and painted their doors the same red as ours and I like being unique – I MUST BE SPECIAL and that has nothing to do with crazya$$edness. So in one word ~~YES~~ I did it. Beloved is not so crazy about it, but said…”If it makes you happy then it makes me happy.” What a guy, the best, the absolute bestest husband I have ever had! And besides it isn’t that hard to paint so when (if) I get tired of it I’ll just repaint some other -neat-OH peat-OH color that nobody else on our street has.

Here is the before of the faux shutters

And here is the after of the faux shutters

Okay what do y’all think? I do value the opinion of my dear internets.

Oh and the front door, we added the “real”{wink} gold kick plate and the fancy gold thingie to the window. I hope that will deter stupid a$$ people from trying to look in. Y’all know what I mean? Folks would actually walk up and cup their hands around their faces, stick their noses up to the glass and try to see in. How do I know this you may ask. Okay go ahead and ask… I watched them on video. No fooling every single kid and junk door hanger just had to try and peek in. Hump!

And now tell me what color is your front door? Does it match your shutters (if ya have ‘em)?

Security who?

Did I tell y’all about the dog we had a while back? Poor little guy we had to…well you know. He was a crazy thing, raised all kinds of havoc chewing on table legs and socks and yes the under britches too. Can you believe I don’t even have a picture of him, no seriously we were so busy chasing him around there was never a chance to snap a shot, stupid little $hit.


In a way I miss that dog with all the frolicking and bouncing around and heck I suppose for that matter even the surprise of what he was going to do next. He was Security Dog in need of training. Oh my goodness this one time I took him to the pet shop over at the mall and he got away from me. I was so scared he was gonna bite someone or pee on somebody ya know. I had run right out the doors after him and yelled and yelled for him to get back here. Then he slipped outta sight so I called and called his name and said cooing words so he wouldn’t think he was in trouble and junk. Here baby, come to momma I got a bone for you, come on. I whistled and smooched my lips and junk. People were being idiots and running away from me as if I had a gun or like they had never saw anyone trying to get their dog back. Finally I found him at the pretzel kiosk begging for a pretzel, I don’t know why after all he had just ate before we left home. The kid working it said “hey lady, you need to do something about your dog.” And you know me I said, “ya think so huh?” I would like to say I picked the little $hit up and whipped him, but no I didn’t want an assault charge so I ignored him and put my dog back on the leash and walked away mumbling about how I had found a roach in my pretzel. Yeah I did, y’all so know I did. Then next thing he did, you won’t believe this…

We were going on a trip and it involved an airplane ride, we had everything all lined up for taking our dog and things were going surprisingly well, then somehow he escaped from his crate. What a mess, there was airport personnel everywhere looking and trying not to make too much of a deal outta it, afraid they would be sued or something I guess. The gate girl, I don’t know what else to call her, came and got us to see if we could get the dog to stop running in the terminal. Maybe y’all remember the news story? Anyways people started freaking out, screaming and running in the same direction we were going. There was such mayhem you would’ve thought someone had a bomb. All we were doing was looking for our crazy a$$ed dog.

Here boy, smooch-smooch, Security, Security! Come here Security, come to momma. What? That was his name, Duh I told you that, Security Dog. Hey that’s a great name, just think about it, you know it’s a good one. No really imagine where it can take you and all the stuff you can do with it. SO what’s wrong with that?

But needless to say, we missed our flight and came to the sad conclusion that Security had to go, we found a good home for him and last I heard he was very happy and the new owners dropped the Security part and just keep the Dog.

Now tell me my dear internets, was reading this as funny for you as when Beloved told me about this dream? You did get it right? The dog’s name was Security and we were running around calling for Security and people freaking out and all the mayhem because of our lost Security. Surely y’all got it ;-p

What a boob

Okay so I decided to take my own advice and went down to get an overdue mammogram. Yeah, I hear ya my dear internets those of us that have had prior biopsies should not miss our annuals. I won’t bore you with my reasons, or excuses cause we all know I just didn’t want to do it and that’s that. But when lefty went to itching, almost constantly I goggled and found out that could be a symptom of you know. I promptly marched myself over to my Gyn and picked up my scanning orders.


Nope I was not surprised when they called and wanted additional views they always want them from me. It’s like they say, “Oh this one is so great let’s have her come back in so we can see more.” Now what did sorta surprise me was when they also scheduled a Boob Ultra Sound (I didn’t’ even know they had those), they said they wanted to like see the “density” of the mass. Hole E mole E they said MASS. That kinda scared me as it had only been 2 years since my last mamo, which had been the same as the one before it , so yeah nerves woke up and I kicked myself for a couple of days. Then got over it I mean that’s the way it goes we do or don’t do and postpone those things that we know we should do all the time. Yes sometimes we regret that and sometimes we learn a lesson, maybe even a hard lesson.

Y’all know me and my trusty side kick camera, what an opportunity to show y’all how my visit went. See how much I love y’all I think of you in everything I do.

 Here I am in the very pleasant waiting room. Waiting

Here is the atomic boob smasher. Please note how it is trying to intimidate me.

After the nipple dotting ceremony I was very adequately squished. I thought the tech was trying to see just how much pressure lefty could take before exploding into a bloody mess. And next is the lovely little examining room for the ultra sound. Um there was no sound other than my nervous rattling prattle.

And the tech lubed me up quite nicely. The K-jelly was warm and melted into this goopy mess that ran down every hill and valley it could. So she snapped several pictures and I could see the screen. I found the “mass” and in fact there was more than one and they looked like holes in the otherwise wavy water surface of my tissue. Then a doctor came in and “checked” the places the tech had found and snapped pictures of. I asked where the prior marker, titanium thread, was and dr. said that does not show up on the ultra sound just the mamo. And before I asked if they were going to schedule a biopsy the good Doctor informed me there was nothing to worry about, the spots (note now they are spots) were cist and no big deal. Without question she could tell this. See what looked like holes to me had round and smooth looking texture, where as the bad stuff has rough, torn, frayed like texture.

And the moral of this trip is DON’T PUT OFF WHAT CAN SAVE YOUR LIFE. Schedule your Boob Job today if it’s been a year or longer or never. And remember --- Advance warning is the best defense any boob can have even a boob like me OR you.

EDIT: and please remember that MEN can get this type of cancer too, as well as other breast issues, so fellas do those breast exams on yourself or better yet have your partner check it out for ah.

Whats Bugging YOU?

So I had this little problem. I was sitting out on the breezeway contemplating some of the world’s most confounding ideas. When all of a sudden a giant wasp decided to have a drink of my coke and it dived in ~ head first no less. Now I don’t drink soda often, it makes my toes look like sausages, so I was a bit put out. What to do? Well being a regular type of frugal person that I am, I fished it out after it drowned. Then continued on with my contemplatingness and drinking of the now watered down coke. Then Bam! WamOH it occurred to me…Crap that dang-ol’ wasp most likely peed in my coke!

Does it look like it to you? Come on my dear internets, has anything like this happened to you and please tell me that you just fished out the drowned bug and drank on without missing a puddle. Please tell me I’m not the only one…

Sun Screen Bathing

So as I sit here at a hotel, a long weekend trip with my beloved, overlooking a cool blue pool I just can’t help but wonder… {cue wavy – groovy acid dropping funky kinda music} Why a cute blond Texas girl, she must be Texan on accounta her big [you know] brown eyes, had her male friend rub on sun screen. I know it’s sun screen cause it’s the same brand I have, No Ad 45 SPF. Anyways why is she lying out in the sun? They are using a screen to block the sun, right. Does she actually expect to get a tan? I think not. I believe it’s a game of look at me, rub me, know me. Have y’all done this? Oh I would never have, no on accounta when I sunbathed I used tanning oil to help speed up the whole aging sun worshiping process, but now I see the fine error of my lines (oh so fine) and I think if only I had been a night person.

Speaking of me, was so… why do my arms get so brown and my legs are like this glow in the dark TrueBlood sort of white? Season 2 came out recently on DVD. WooWho! Season 3 started June 13, oh yeah. We came across this HBO series last year during a Halloween marathon when we were at the beginning our Autumn Adventure. Y’all member? Sure you do. We love this show and as Beloved says it IS the fastest hour on TV. In fact he loves it so much we not only bought the series we also pay extra to get HBO on our cable, not to mention the brokeness it has caused me personally. And okay I confess it IS an adult show, has nudie sex scenes (think 1 or 2 X) and junk, but it has hooked us both in spite of them. And yes we watch it with baby girl, she closes her eyes for those afore mentioned kind of scenes. No really she does. Just as soon as Season 1 was out we rushed out to get it, so too for Season 2. We found it at our local Best Buy and picked it up for, are you ready, $39.99. No really the price online for pre-order was $54.99, now don’t be mad at us, can we help it if the store had it on special sale and we get some type of loyal customer discount.

We also picked up a bottle of Tru:Blood. It’s this artificial blood beverage, so vampires don’t have to feed on us humans. It has an interesting flavor, doesn’t’ remind me of real honest to goodness blood, but I guess if I were a vamp and hungry I would drink it. If I had to that is. Speaking of vamps have you ever wondered if they go to the bathroom? They don’t “eat” like humans so do they have a digestive system? They ARE technically dead and yet they swallow blood. Does it ever come out, besides as tears? Just saying.

Oh, I gotta go, my Quickie is melting, that’s this frozen adult beverage I’m currently drinking instead of TruBlood, it’s supposed to be some kind of pain killer, but if you ask me I think it’s an attitude adjuster. Did y'all notice I'm all about the adult today!

Oh one more teeny tiny question do you sun bathe or avoid it all costs?

Money is "GREEN"

I recently hear a rumor. Of course some of you may know this already, as I’ve been known to be behind the times on some things. So the rumor I heard is that here in Texas, grocery stores and I thereby assume all stores, that use those little plastic bags are going to start charging for said bags. Upwards of 49 cents; I know outrageous! cause that is what I thought. My source said its true they (you know them) are already charging for the bags in other countries and some areas of some States. I understand that California Wal Marts are charging. Also after they started doing that the price of the “green” bags went up. Which had been my first thought…well I’ll just pick up some canvas bags before the price goes up.


From what I understand a tax has been suggested on these handy dandy disposable bags and that my dear internets is enough of a threat to start retailers charging for them. I had some canvas bags at one time (think 80’s) for groceries, but they were too narrow, so I started using them for other things. Yes I have seen the new ones, but hey I’m an average American and have always felt that I already pay for them. Hey after all they (yes them again) increase product / item prices when the Stock Shortage ratings go up. Okay for any of you non retail job holding people, Stock Shortage is what it’s called when a store has missing products / items, y’all know when stupid people shop lift, borrow, pick up a 5 finger discount from stores. We all pay for it in higher prices and now, well now it’s beginning to look like we will be paying for all those loverly plastic bags that litter the sides of roads and dangle in trees or get sweep up by barbed wire fences.

Well we’re no dummies, no sirree, we all know they (who ever they are) have invented biodegradable bags, so why don’t they (you know) make stores use this kind then it wouldn’t be a issue. Surely those type of bags are no more expensive and thereby too costly for the bottom line. But I tell you dear internets perhaps bio-bags are an option for house hold trash. Speaking of which they have got to be bad, I mean they are built stronger so as not to break and spill yuck on your floors so they (bags) must be too strong to pop open in the landfills and hinder the breakdown of all our garbage. Just saying.

Personally I use those handy little bags for transporting more than groceries and stuff from the gettin stores. They (plastic bags not them) make purdy good totes for wet bathing suits and little trash can liners and for overnight bags in case a grandchild spends the night over here. Now back to the rumor…y’all know we do “green” junk around here, but it’s not because we are “green” people it is because it saves us money (that kind of green) So I’m gonna pick up or make some of those green bags. They (bags) may not actually be the color green, but I will only pay for them once and have ‘em till they wear out, a little like this rumor post.

Are you already paying for lil’ plastic bags? Are you already using the “green” bags? Do you think I’m just a crazy A$$ spreading rumors?

Springy-Dingy-Gone

Well spring made it to our house and the plum trees bloomed, then the pear and finally the nectarine. Will we get any fruit? If we do will the squirrels beat us to them? Who knows, now it’s summer. Yes already. Spring was about 2 days then bam-a-lang muggy summer fell upon us.

We worked in the yard all day! I bet our neighbors are glad because the front yard looks 100% better. I’m not joking when I say it really looked like crap. Ya know just like the yard of an abandoned house and really I guess it sorta was. We had not done anything since they cut the tree down in October, but now it’s all better. The rose has a bud on it, I planted tomatoes in the flower bed where the hibiscus used to be, before it froze and refroze.

And as I type this post the phone company is laying new Fiber Optic Lines you will never believe where…that’s right in our back yard. Which, by the way, just happens to be where the fruit trees are and the shed. Yes folks this survey reading, mortgage document specialist put a shed and trees, oh and a little vegetable bed right in the 10 foot utility easement. Yes my dear internets I knew where it was, but the service poles on are the other side of the fence, so the odds were in our favor that that it would be no big deal-e-oh at all. Did I mention they are “laying” fiber optic lines-- underground? Yeah they are digging in the back yard as I type. But not to worry they are using this hammer do-hicky that is in a hose thingy that pounds it’s way though the ground. It seems to just be vibrating the ground near the trees and under the veggi bed. And who knows maybe they’ll like it, y’all know all that shaking and rocking what-not. I’m not that big on the work part, but I like the sitting and admiring part don’t you?

So have you gotten the chance, weather, to work in your yard? Do you have a yard?

It was the Alarm

There I was sleeping and dreaming {cue your own favorite personal dream music]. Let’s see what was I dreaming, I was skipping through a green grassy field…no I was riding in a fast car down a two lane road…no maybe I was ball dancing in a beautiful purple flowy dress and spiked Barbie shoes? We will never know what it was because that dream was sucked right outta my head. Stupid dang ol’ alarm that went screeching and blaring and making that God awful the hotel is on fire noise! Holy CRAP! FIRE! No kidding my dear internets the alarm went off just before midnight, argh. We jumped up slipped on shoes, grabbed coats, pants, precious laptop and medicine. $hit, $hit, and my purse. We walk quickly out the door, there was no smoke, my eyes were very blurry, but no sign or smell of smoke. There was some kind of weird smell and someone asked what is was, I said that’s a skunk, but really I think someone farted. No it wasn’t me.

The Needum fire department guys were there in about 5-7 minutes. Yea-way to go team. They went up on the 3rd floor where the alarm was first set off, that would be the 2 floors above our room. The police came and went up. Firemen were walking around with tools and such. A policeman was standing near us we could not help but over heard what was going on. Yes I so did eavesdrop, you know you would have too.

Are you ready for this? Turns out someone (Room 315) didn’t want to go all the way outside to smoke a cigarette so they smoked one in the stair well. Did you hear me? THEY WERE SMOKING IN THE STAIRWELL! Lazy a$$ smoker got ticketed and fined and I think kicked out the hotel. Oh my dear smoking internets please don’t let this be you, please don’t get caught smoking in a non-smoking area it’s expensive.

So now back to me, after parading around for over an hour in my pjs we were let back in our room.

Baby Girl tossed for about 5 minutes, Beloved took 20 and me, well I lay there writing this post (not on the computer but in my head) yes complete with typos. And then I would edit it which meant I had to start it all over from the beginning. I don’t mind telling you that I’m a bit tired.

So why then was this not posted first thing today? I knew you would ask so I’ll tell you. We meet with the Oncologist down at MD Anderson. So we had to leave the not burnt up hotel house before the sun got outta bed.

Okay here’s the news for that: Protein is the same (this is good), but the cancer count went up slightly over 1000 points (this is not good) So what’s the plan you ask…

Two months complete bone scan, MRI with and without contrast, blood test and 24 hour urine test. Dr. Wang (pronounced Wong) will work out a treatment plan, penciled in for starting something in March.

Please forgive blurry photos, typos and missing words, as I know you, all of you my dear internets will.

So the other day

on my birthday we were at the movie theatre, Beloved was buying tickets

“Three for Daybreakers, please.” ***movie review next time as this post is all about moi.

Baby girl and I were standing sorta behind him. I could see the cashier glance at us…

She said, “Any seniors or students?”

Wha, wha, WHAT? Oh yes she did. I could understand her mistake after all I was wearing a big coat (it was 26 degrees F) a scarf around my old turkey neck, celebrity sun glasses (it was sunny) and I had a fresh hair cut so my silver threads surely must have been shinning so brightly that she could only guess that maybe I was. A student, now wouldn’t that have been sweet, but no she meant senior. SENIOR. If she only knew that I am actually (surely) 10 years younger, nah 15 years her junior and a much better crazy a$$ than she. Humph!

No wait there’s more…Beloved latter whispered to me that he almost turned around to ask me, “Mom are you a senior now?” What a man, I just have to love him. Well I do on accounta we are married and that makes me obligated. Doesn’t it?

Guess what? I brushed my teeth with my right hand. WoooWhoooo! I’m such a big girl.


Here is a weird question for all my dear internets to ponder

Does the tongue wrinkle when people (not me) get old?

Logic OR Not

You can make logical suggestions, advice if you prefer, to people and they think you are stupid or whatever. For instance a lady at my office said her daughter “still cannot find a teaching job.” Of course if she were willing to teach junior or high school and was bilingual, her odds would be better. So being the smart a$$ that I am I suggested Rosetta Stone because that would enable her some basic communication skills. Most (about ¾) of our hispanic population, in my town, is straight up from Mexico and they speak in dialects not “proper Spanish” like most English speaking folks. So back to my suggestion, the lady at my office said 'no her daughter doesn’t want to do that.' So naturally like you just did, I thought then she doesn’t want to be a teacher or maybe she doesn’t want to have to move out when she gets a job. But knowing her mom like I do, her mom would be hunky doory with daughter living at home forever…heck I have never even heard that the daughter had a boyfriend and she is now 23; I’m just saying

++++++

I must be a foreign life form, cause I just don’t get it. I mean not just the above but all these people that think their children are perfect; never doing any wrong…because if that is the case why are there so many kids committing crimes, skipping school and never leaving home? Some of ‘em were not and have not been held accountable to their own actions, or lack thereof. But I suppose they will all be taken care of anyway by our government. Wonder where that money comes from? You know the money they will spend on the unemployed people and illegal’s health care. Hey I know maybe we all could quit our jobs and be eligible too. Hum communism at its best

We are leading ourselves like lambs to the slaughter and in some cases trying to be the first one in line.

Ugly - Bugly

Do y’all remember this ugly shed?




Of course you do. It was an out building that night mares were made of…teaming with snakes and rats a hole in the floor right at the doorway waiting to trip anyone, everyone that dared to enter. Did I mention the spiders oh the spiders on tiny thin threads dangling from the ceiling. Brushing your face and making you cringe and say words I will not repeat in this post. And at long last it is gone and a new one has been erected, not on the same spot but nearby. This has opened our back yard up and the new shed is smaller and thereby we will be less inclined to keep crap that we don’t truly need.


Oh it didn’t go up as easy as was expected, some of that may be due to us not being as agile as we once were and some was because they had stupid instructions. I mean really who would put together a floor then the roof trusses? Then the walls and the gables then put the trusses in. Wheew but now it is done.

I had to do a bit of beautification cause that is how I am. We put in a smallish flower bed, incorporating a walk way to get behind the building. Now that is a dark and scary place. Oh remember that stack of bricks that I moved a long time ago and found the copperhead nest, yeah well I moved them one more time. And yes there was a couple of snakes but this time they were regular dead grass snakes. Back to the bricks they now outlines the planting areas and were used for the pathway. I do not; let me repeat that DO NOT want to move those damn bricks ever again.


So whadda y’all think?

Life on a Texas Highway

I know we all have them and we all want to be rid of them and if you are one of them quit it just STOP IT RIGHT NOW!

The makeup artist. You know who they are you see them in morning rush hour traffic bouncing between the lines or off of cars and concrete barricades. Oh look here’s one now.




What you can’t tell from the photograph is what she is doing. I know she is dotting on her foundation and smoothing it out, applying her power and blush soon she will be putting on mascara. I can see it plain as day-much better than my camera does. And yes it’s true, I have been behind this woman before in fact I have been trying to get a picture of her for quite some time and recently I got lucky.



Not only did I get to scoot by her without being hit, bumped or rear ended but I also got this fabulous photo of her in my rear view mirror as I was stopped in traffic and she was not; at least she wasn’t yet.


Gosh I hope it didn’t hurt too bad…you know when the mascara wand poked her bright eye.

Moral of this post DON’T PUT ON MAKEUP WHILE YOU ARE DRIVING because you never know, I mean really just never know when I –or someone like me, will be there snapping your photo and posting it on the internet for all to see just how stupidly pretty and invincible you think you are. – Wonder how she will look in a casket when her face goes through the windshield; bet her cheeks would have a blood red blush to ‘em.

What a Surprise!

Dear internets I have a confession; Sometimes I am not the swiftest of people, no really it’s true. Y’all remember when I won that super cool CD from the Funster, earlier this month. I was so excited when I picked up the mail that I just sort of tore into the envelope and pulled out the CD case and stuck it in my player and giggled out. I keept it in my truck all this time, envelope and all, well I was finally ready to download it on my IPod so I put the CD case back in the envelope and took it in the house. I pulled the case out and low and behold another letter sized envelope fell out. I telling ya t just fell out in my lap. Yeah, was my first thought she sent me money! Like it was my birthday or something but it was better then money.

It contained a sweet personal letter from Jannie to Me! Handwritten on pretty paper inside an envelope with a pretty inside. Sooo Cool. Now Jannie Funster must think I’m a real a$$ for not mentioning this before and I admit I’m a goober for overlooking it.

So I want to send out another thank you to Miss Kelly for picking my comment number during the ‘I Want A Man CD’ give away and a thank you to Ms Funster for the great songs and music and the pretty note that I just found. See it was a good surprise, what next Jannie a song written just for moi?

(Sspt, do y’all think she got the hint?)

Cold Stone Showoffs

So I had this hankerin for some Cold Stone Ice-cream (yummy tummy) and after about 2 weeks I had to have it. The closest place to us is a little inconvenient but when baby girl had a friend spend the night I thought ‘hey lets show off and go over there for some icey creamy goodness.’ It was gonna be a two fer special kind of day for lets call her Scooter-not her real name.

I get the ice-cream and Scooter’s gets an afternoon of firsts. Her first time over to that little townette and to have that excellent ice-cream. Ok so maybe it was a 3-fer or even a 4-fer, heck maybe a 5-fer kind of day. You know how they can just jump up and surprise you. We sat on a park bend to watch some little kiddies play in a fountain and to eat our treat. Beloved had a small mint chocolate shake, I had a small chocolate waffle cone, baby girl had a medium berry bowl (hang on I’m getting there) and Scooter had a large strawberry cheesecake in a chocolate dipped with sprinkles waffle bowl- topped with marshmallow ice cream. And yes she ate the whole thing

. This is my hand & my empty waffle cone holder

Scooter wanted to ride the trolley, so we climbed aboard, she just keep saying cool, awesome and wow. We got off the free ride near another fountain and the “water wall”. That’s what the locals call it – let me explain, it is an average height wall of cascading water that can be controlled by a computer. They can make it ripple down, pour down ir any combination thereof. In that area there is also a fountain, only this one is what I call a spitting fountain – again let me explain…they program the water so it shoots outta one hole in the ground and glides or spits over to another hole in the ground. This was very entertaining as the little kids playing there were never quite sure where the water was going to pop up from. So our two young ladies thought they would show them how. Ah that’s too bad…yeah it didn’t go as they had planned. But to make ‘em feel better or at least to forget about their mishap I had them pose for pictures- cause I just never take enough and girls just like to pose.

Before long they did indeed forget, distractions and short term memory works. We went up a flight of stairs back to street level and I had them sit on the edge of a big “pool”. I am happily snapping away then screams and laughter erupted as did the water in the “pool” it shot up at least one and a half stories high and scared our poor little girls. But we had to get going if we were to catch the movie they wanted to see—Drag me to Hell. I’m not one for gratuitous gore so I was not looking forward to it.

Now the real part of this post is about our expensive bottle of water…It was hot and sunny and hot. We had been walking a while and Beloved has a bad knee and the other issue that he doesn’t want to be an issue. So when Beloved gets to feeling unwell and needs water it is an immediate gotta have it now! So we go into this restaurant for some water. Cue the eerie stupid music and wavy lines—double doors open revealing a huge beautiful wood and glass fancy assed bar. Four down trodden people trudge in, sweat dripping from their brows, beat red faces. Better than anybody waiter in a black apron, black pants and shiny shoes with crisp white shirt and blah tie
“Table for four?” says he.
Beloved said “No. I just need some water, please.”
Dumfounded waiter wrings his hands and looks over at the waiter standing beside him, he shrugs? “What?”
Beloved, “Water”
Waiter more confused by such a simple request “Huh?”
Beloved turns around and begins to walk away. I said in my loud crude way of protecting those I dearly love… “Water! Get him some water…” neither one moved “now!”
Dumbass waiter, “Water?
I nodded and said “Yes, don’t y’all have a faucet that brings water into the building?” – ok so maybe I didn’t say that exactly but it was close. I made Beloved sit down and the waiter looks at me. So I raise my eyebrows and said “Water!”
Stupider than a rock waiter, “Oh… ah … ah. Do you want bottled?”
Now I’m glaring at him and wonder what kind of nightmare did his mother have raising such an idiot kid? And I said, “Ah yeah.”
So he pops up behind the bar with two bottles of water, a small and a large (wine sized bottle), we took the smaller glass bottle. At least the waiter had a bottle opener. I suppose if you all you can do is hand out bottles to people that is the only real talent you need. We laid a five dollar bill on the bar and received no change. Beloved drank half the bottle and we left, expensive bottle in hand, finished it on the way to the book store. He read on the bottle that it was Nestle water, you know the one you can buy at Sams Club for about 75 cents each.


Then after a bit of relaxing rest in a comfy chair in the sweet air conditioned book store, we mossied back to our truck and away to the movies we went. The girls thought the movie was good, I thought it was icky gross and made me jump too many times and squint my eyes closed too much, Beloved thought it (the movie not me) was funny and laughed at many scenes. It is rated PG and that’s all I have to say about that.