June 23, 2009

Life on a Texas Highway

I know we all have them and we all want to be rid of them and if you are one of them quit it just STOP IT RIGHT NOW!

The makeup artist. You know who they are you see them in morning rush hour traffic bouncing between the lines or off of cars and concrete barricades. Oh look here’s one now.

What you can’t tell from the photograph is what she is doing. I know she is dotting on her foundation and smoothing it out, applying her power and blush soon she will be putting on mascara. I can see it plain as day-much better than my camera does. And yes it’s true, I have been behind this woman before in fact I have been trying to get a picture of her for quite some time and recently I got lucky.

Not only did I get to scoot by her without being hit, bumped or rear ended but I also got this fabulous photo of her in my rear view mirror as I was stopped in traffic and she was not; at least she wasn’t yet.

Gosh I hope it didn’t hurt too bad…you know when the mascara wand poked her bright eye.

Moral of this post DON’T PUT ON MAKEUP WHILE YOU ARE DRIVING because you never know, I mean really just never know when I –or someone like me, will be there snapping your photo and posting it on the internet for all to see just how stupidly pretty and invincible you think you are. – Wonder how she will look in a casket when her face goes through the windshield; bet her cheeks would have a blood red blush to ‘em.


Jannie Funster said...

Am I first?!?!?

Jannie Funster said...

Yay, I wuzz first!

Well, I have certainly done that in my younger year. Now I only put on make-up when I'm late for somewhere because it's Guranteed that as soon as I pull out the mascara brush the light will go green. Every time! Try it, if you dare.

Or bring a book if you want to get all green lights too. Open the book and put on steering wheel anticipating a couple minutes to read. But no! No red lights at all.


The troof, the whole troof and nutting but the troof does I tells you here.

Jean-Luc Picard said...

I wonder what the drivers think of someone in a car taking pics of them?

Dapoppins said...


Takes on a whole new meaning on your blog! And you have seen her before? As in, she does this allllll the time?

I see some high insurance rates in her future!

Aunt Amelia's Attic said...


Well, guess that beats cell phone use while driving... on the Stupid Scale.

Aunt Amelia

Liara Covert said...

Make-up artist in transit takes multi-tasking to a new level. FOund you on Jannie Funster's blog.

... Paige said...

Yes, Jannie you were first. In fact I begged everyone to “pretty please don’t comment until after Jannie does so she can be first, it would make her day.” And see I was right and all my dear internets deserve a big THANK YOU

Jean-Luc, I usually only take pictures when I’m stopped or not driving; sometimes I get smiles and waves and sometimes I see funny little birds flitter about.

Da, I have seen this chick many times and watched her speed up, slow down and bounce between the lines and folks honk at her. She used to have a little red car but for about a year (I guess) it’s been this white one.

Aunt Amelia, you can tell when someone is using the moving telephone booth, they always seem to slow down, really slow, I mean extra super slow. Hey does that make them “slow”?

Liara, glad you came by and hope my road rage didn’t run you off, I’ll be right over…

And Jannie Funster says….THANK YOU DEAR INTERNETS

Adrenalynn said...

Ohmygod, I LOVE this!! I can't believe you actually got that awesome shot.

I'm totally scared to death of doing anything while driving! And yet I took off my pantyhose the other day at a red light. Without moving my fitted pencil skirt. And then the light changed when I had finished one leg. It was not pretty.

Tammy said...

You are such a sarcastic. I love that bout cha.

I am going to post something, sometime.....I am on posting hold right now because my life has been out of control and crazy with things to take care of.

... Paige said...

Adrenalynn, I can so picture the pantyhose removal and that is funny! I just usually pick my nose as I stare at a driver next to me, they make the funniest faces so I start laughing then my nose bleeds and I stop... laughing that is.

Tammy, me, moi, sour-casting, nah, I’m way to sweet for that, well except for my vinegar spit and believe me when I say it is hard to talk with a pickled tongue. That is how my accent came about ya know? I just blame it on being southern, but just between us 2, it's the pickling factor. really!

Tammy said...

That comment is hilarious to me, let me tell you why........a long time ago when I first started blogging I wrote a comment to one of my friends on line about containing my tongue in a pickle jar in my basement. Ha ha...what you said here reminded me of that comment.