Popped in the Crown

No not really, just wanted to get your attention. Did it work?


You know you are the boss of you? Really you are. You have the choice every single day, every single moment, of what you are going to say and do. I know some of us say that our hands are tied and we just have to do {insert whatever} But the fact is we still do what we want.

We do our jobs and perform in them the way we should. We expect ourselves to do the right thing, okay some of us do and those are the only ones I’m addressing here. Now I’m guilty of wondering about those other kinds of people. Y’all know them, they never seem to take things seriously, they are always getting bailed out of some kind of self made jam. Seem to skate by trouble and even when they fall in a pile of poo they come out smelling like the cliché rose. Yeah I knew you knew at least one person like that.

Why do we let that under out skin? I know sometimes what they do does affect us personally and sometimes in a really bad way…

But is it their fault that THEY chose to be un-responsible, un-liable, un-kind even?

Do you think maybe it’s our fault that WE choose to be responsible, liable and kind? They don’t seem to hold it against us. Just saying.

Have you seen my new Crown? I got it on clearance at the exclusive Royal Store. It’s shown here, the one that shines so much yeah on the right, next to my older one, yes they are surrounded by blissful dark chocolates.

I know it’s so loverly with all the Gin-U-Whine Die-Mounds on it. I wear it from time to time, but all this power sometimes, well just sometimes it gives me a headache and I think of crap like the above.

What about you, have I left you speechless?

Here's the scoop...

So I started these classes, to improve my office skills and they are taking more time and brain cells then I would have thought. Ahh who am I kidding…I’m trying to learn accounting hooey. And let me say, no offense to any of my number inclined dear internets, it is very brain taxing. And full of reverse, backwards, opposite kinds of a system. Humph!


I’m also taking Excel 2007, next month will be quick books (?) and another round of accounting and Excel and I won’t even mention October and the rest of my life…Now that I have complained about a good thing I will trudge on.

I will still be posting (gotta have some funs), however my visiting of your places may be a little less than normal. I’ll try to come over when I can and if my brain allows I’ll leave love notes or kicks in the pants; whichever is necessary. Okay fine so maybe a hug.

Numbers and figuring is making me a little OCD. I drive the car and try and figure out how many miles to a gallon and was the money I gave to Jon (a lady friend-really) enough to cover it? Baby girl has started back to school and there went my schedule. Now I’m trying to figure out timing, take her there, what can I get done before I need to pick her up, what’s for supper, where’s my pencil, did I do that…

Okay, calm down, it will be alright. It will be whatever it will be and I’ll cope with it. Isn’t that what I always say, well maybe not quite like that, but sorta?

One step at a time, one hurdle, another step, another hurdle and still I weigh too much! Well after all weight, like sex, is involved with everything. Right? Crunch, crunch, crunch! Oh sorry that was the sound of-- no not exercise silly, but eating. Do I have y’all convinced at how busy I am? Well I am, so off I go, a lesson is waiting for me to learn it and so on and so forth.

And how are you doing? Yes, of course I still expect you to comment here---like duh!

Shutter the Door

Y’all remember when I talked about painting the shutters and front door? I’m sure you do after all y’all don’t have anything else to remember right? Just junk about moi, such is the life of this Queen of this Paradise Valley not 2 mention Hell’s Mountain.


Member? I said that some other stupid people on my street went and painted their doors the same red as ours and I like being unique – I MUST BE SPECIAL and that has nothing to do with crazya$$edness. So in one word ~~YES~~ I did it. Beloved is not so crazy about it, but said…”If it makes you happy then it makes me happy.” What a guy, the best, the absolute bestest husband I have ever had! And besides it isn’t that hard to paint so when (if) I get tired of it I’ll just repaint some other -neat-OH peat-OH color that nobody else on our street has.

Here is the before of the faux shutters

And here is the after of the faux shutters

Okay what do y’all think? I do value the opinion of my dear internets.

Oh and the front door, we added the “real”{wink} gold kick plate and the fancy gold thingie to the window. I hope that will deter stupid a$$ people from trying to look in. Y’all know what I mean? Folks would actually walk up and cup their hands around their faces, stick their noses up to the glass and try to see in. How do I know this you may ask. Okay go ahead and ask… I watched them on video. No fooling every single kid and junk door hanger just had to try and peek in. Hump!

And now tell me what color is your front door? Does it match your shutters (if ya have ‘em)?

Squirrely Cotton

Y’all, my dear internets, know how I have been planting a few cotton plants the last couple/few years. I know you member, Anyway this year they have really been looking good. Lots of blooms and bug free bolls. I have been expecting quite the hall in cotton balls and just waiting for them to pop, once the August sun beat down on them in all it dryness.

Almost daily I would go check on my loverly little cotton plants. I would ever so gingerly move aside leaves to get a better look at the green pods just waiting to burst. Thoughts of what I could do with all the cotton I would surely get…Q-tips, towels, quilts and cotton blue-jeans. Hey it could have happened…

That is until those damned crazy a$$ed squirrels decided they, the un-popped cotton bolls, looked like some kind of fancy smachy French nuts or something. One evening while eating super I notice some white stuff laying out near the flower bed, so when I finished eating I went to see what it was. Well I declare it was a cotton boll. What!? Teeth marks? Those little tree rats plucked it right off the plant and gnawed it open. See, can you see the little teeth marks?

The cotton was fully formed, the seeds were not and it was damp, but I saved the cotton and tossed the seeds. Then the very next morning I went out to check my loofa plants and the cotton plants and dang it all if those devil critters didn’t tear almost every single boll off one of the cotton plants…

A couple were in holes, green tops barely poking outta the dirt and a couple had just been chewed on an strew about in the damp grass. What ta H E double hockey sticks. How am I supposed to guard my precious cotton plants? Keep ‘em safe from the evil likes of squirrels?

Where’s my gun, I’ll show those varmints whose cotton that is. What about you, any kind of varmints eating at ya? Tree rats? People rats? Boss rats?

It's a cover up

Gonna have a baby. No not me, my silly dear internets my youngest son’s girlfriend (now to be known as the Baby Momma). Baby won’t be here til mid December, but y’all know me (if not, you may learn more about me by reading old post, my profile or the 100 things about Paige)


Okay so now that the self promotion commercial is over, I was inspired (by the baby) to do a project.

Yes my dears it was time to pull out some fabrics and thread up the old sewing machine. I really think it’s gonna be a girl but they (parents to be) think it’s a boy so I decided to make two blankets one more feminine than the other. And as I have said before I don’t make blankets that are too “babyish” and these are no exception. I want my grandbabies to tote their blankie for many years without the baby stigma attached. So pending the gender of my next grandchild they will get one or the other of these and I of course will save the leftover one for grandbaby #10.

How many grandchildren do y’all have or do you have none?

 What about kidos any of them?

Y’all know it is perfectly alright not to want kids, no really it is.

Hole-EEE Barnyards

Oh, my goodness! They at last have turned up or should that be flown up? Anywhos those naughty Salt & Pepper Shakers that ran off from me, remember, went north. Funny I always thought snow birds flew south, but hey what else should I have expected from a couple of chickens.


Oh, so you want to know where they are? Okay you may find them here. I hope they have a good time and don’t get too steamed up that close to fancy smanchy Lobster Pepper & Salts.

Did I forget

Something? It was important…hum ah yes now I remember.

Do you member when I told y'all about the Six Sentences humor piece of mine? I’m sure you do. Well anyways low and behold it was somehow picked  chosen to be published in a book, Half a World Away, which you may get from here. I know how cool is that? So if you do purchase a copy and you would like it autographed by moi, let me know and I’ll see if my agent can arrange it. haha and hehe, nah I’d be glad to oblige. paigevonliber at gmail dot com with “autograph” in the subject line.

Oooo, how exciting, me in a real published “paper” book! Next thing ya know I'll be going to the grocery store...cause I think we are outta milk.

Hugs to all my dear internets & Rob over at Six Sentences

Crazy Rumor

Bless my soul and beat the dust outta my britches. Someone went and spread the rumor that I had a lovely blog. What??? you may say, and believe me I did too. But it’s true my dear internet Linda of Left Brain Write said it, and she honest about junk like that so it must be truly true. Thank you dear Linda I am honored if not surprised...loverly indeed :-)

Now I should feel guilty because I’m just awful on accounta I don’t remember if there were “rules” attached. Okay I’m pretty sure there were, but I’m disregarding them and passing this doozie of an Award at some well deserving dear internets. So if y’all want to stick some rules on it if or when you pass it on, don’t mind me and do what feels right for your lovely blog. So here goes…and the Lovely Blog Award goes to (dumdeedeedum)

A Writer’s Edge
Down River Drivel
Quoteflections
What’s in my Head
Unedited
Actual Unretouched Photo
Jingle
Susan’s Snipets
Teahouse Blossom
Jean Luc Captain Picard’s Journal
Grace Notes
A Writer’s Point of View

Congratulations my loverlies, I don’t think I could be any happier, at this very moment unless Publishers Clearing House were to knock on my door (Please knock on my door) Ahh well maybe soon.

And now a question for y’all my dear internets---What do you think of the Flashlight Follower Feature?

Security who?

Did I tell y’all about the dog we had a while back? Poor little guy we had to…well you know. He was a crazy thing, raised all kinds of havoc chewing on table legs and socks and yes the under britches too. Can you believe I don’t even have a picture of him, no seriously we were so busy chasing him around there was never a chance to snap a shot, stupid little $hit.


In a way I miss that dog with all the frolicking and bouncing around and heck I suppose for that matter even the surprise of what he was going to do next. He was Security Dog in need of training. Oh my goodness this one time I took him to the pet shop over at the mall and he got away from me. I was so scared he was gonna bite someone or pee on somebody ya know. I had run right out the doors after him and yelled and yelled for him to get back here. Then he slipped outta sight so I called and called his name and said cooing words so he wouldn’t think he was in trouble and junk. Here baby, come to momma I got a bone for you, come on. I whistled and smooched my lips and junk. People were being idiots and running away from me as if I had a gun or like they had never saw anyone trying to get their dog back. Finally I found him at the pretzel kiosk begging for a pretzel, I don’t know why after all he had just ate before we left home. The kid working it said “hey lady, you need to do something about your dog.” And you know me I said, “ya think so huh?” I would like to say I picked the little $hit up and whipped him, but no I didn’t want an assault charge so I ignored him and put my dog back on the leash and walked away mumbling about how I had found a roach in my pretzel. Yeah I did, y’all so know I did. Then next thing he did, you won’t believe this…

We were going on a trip and it involved an airplane ride, we had everything all lined up for taking our dog and things were going surprisingly well, then somehow he escaped from his crate. What a mess, there was airport personnel everywhere looking and trying not to make too much of a deal outta it, afraid they would be sued or something I guess. The gate girl, I don’t know what else to call her, came and got us to see if we could get the dog to stop running in the terminal. Maybe y’all remember the news story? Anyways people started freaking out, screaming and running in the same direction we were going. There was such mayhem you would’ve thought someone had a bomb. All we were doing was looking for our crazy a$$ed dog.

Here boy, smooch-smooch, Security, Security! Come here Security, come to momma. What? That was his name, Duh I told you that, Security Dog. Hey that’s a great name, just think about it, you know it’s a good one. No really imagine where it can take you and all the stuff you can do with it. SO what’s wrong with that?

But needless to say, we missed our flight and came to the sad conclusion that Security had to go, we found a good home for him and last I heard he was very happy and the new owners dropped the Security part and just keep the Dog.

Now tell me my dear internets, was reading this as funny for you as when Beloved told me about this dream? You did get it right? The dog’s name was Security and we were running around calling for Security and people freaking out and all the mayhem because of our lost Security. Surely y’all got it ;-p

Want my 2 cents?

Please note the first ever Flashlight Follower in my side bar...

Okay so this is a post of silly photos. Shots I took and just couldn’t quite come up with something smart a$$ed to say about ‘em.

First there is the view of brand new pennies- pretty faux copper like metal. Copper is very expensive and so it has been watered down, if you will, with some other kinds of metal to make the “real” copper go further without costing so much. Like the fact that it is more valuable as metal than as a penny, just saying.

Okay now this is nice shot of some air and water, nice things for everyone to have…in case of emergency of course.

And here is the shot of some background papers I did using a mono print with Plexiglas technique. Kinda cool and easy to do. Just brush your acrylic paint on the glass and then lay your paper on top and brayer it a bit.

This is a shot of the Nielsen survey we got in the mail that I was gonna post and tell you all about us being this big fancy Nielsen family and junk, but I guess we just didn’t pass the addition. Yes the 2 dollars was for filling out the paperwork but WhateEVER happens, happens.

Alright that brings us to the last shot, this was a store I saw in a stripe center in Spring Texas and I said hey what a neat name, let’s go in and see what kind of junk they have. Ah well I suppose it was not such a good name after all cause all it was, was just a name on a closed and empty store.

What sort of stuff do you suppose they tried to sell? Maybe Bull horns, “grab the bull by the horns” OR violin strings (cat guts) OR hows about some priceless faux ivory. What do you think?

ps: Its never too late to become a follower, just saying.