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October 28, 2010

Finally a conclusion

Alright WARNING straight up front…don’t read this if you are sensitive due to a recent death in your family. This was pre-written and pre-posted, so who knows who is around anymore. My deepest and heartfelt sympathies. For the previousVirtual  Funeral Museum Tour post # 1, # 2 and # 3.

And now gather round my dear internets. Here are some fine examples of standard and not so standard coffins. No, these are older models of boxes, not new ones. Elisabeth. No, don’t be silly Jen, this is a family coffin not for a larger than life type person like moi.


Oh, yes, that is real money Paul. No Snag we can’t take a pick to it to get it out, that would just be wrong.


And here is what a normal casket maker’s shop would have looked like


This is a really, really fancy smanchy Undertaker Ambulance


Now don’t be too disappointed I know the section on U.S. Presidents is smaller than that of the Pope, but so it goes. Hey let’s not get political during this segment, Sheila and you too Stacy Sue. Jean Luc I heard that.

{cue the U.S. National Anthem}

I know I don’t have to tell y’all who this is, but I will because of our out of the U.S. Virtual Museum Tour guest. This is a recreation of Abraham Lincoln.


This is the bill for President Washington’s funeral. Can you image how elaborate it was to have cost $99.25?



Now this glass case exhibit is not about a president, it’s about General Grant. It was sorta hard to take photographs of stuff in glass cases ya know. What with all the glare and light pointing the wrong way and ghostie like images.


We sat for a moment in the cubby hole memorial about the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier in Arlington Cemetery. Sorry I didn’t take photos, the exhibit provoked memories of when Beloved and I were there and watched the changing of the guard and new wreath placement in real life. It was very personal and moving and one event I think all Americans should experience, if at all possible.

Okay let’s move into the little gift shop.


Yes Daisy, they do have lots of bookmarks. Oh I know Hilary, I saw the loverly crosses and yes Mark even all the cool Egyptian things. Hey Jeni did you see the candies? Ah yes, I think maybe I could use a shot of this.


Okay that’s it. No, really that’s all folks. Yes there is plenty to see that I didn’t show you and no I didn’t go into detail about the stuff. Hey stop complaining, will ya, I did have to leave something for when y’all come to visit the National Museum of Funeral History in real life. Call and I'll let ya buy me lunch or dinner. Now be careful out there, remember there will be some little ghosties, goblins and whatever kind of popular political figures out begging for candy. And no don’t even thing about TPing my house, Bee!


Y'all come back now, ya hear!

October 26, 2010

Dear Internets, I have a surprise!

Okay, so y’all know that it was our anniversary, but what you don’t know is where we went. Now don’t get too excited, stop clawing at your mouse (mice). We went up to Fort Worth, Texas, to attend the Fall Festival in the Japanese Garden, which is held at the Botanical Gardens. The drive up we uneventful, unless you count our being sleepy as an event.

We had a backpack with some waters, snacks and umbrellas as I expected rain. The mid morning was pretty good, not hot and not raining. We walked around and took photos, you knew I would…See


We watched some great drummers! Their performance was very physical, highly energetic and super entertaining. Dondoko Taiko Drummers


Then some fellas demonstrated the Dojo of traditional Japanese Martial Arts. For those of us that don’t know that is where they remove the samurai sword from the sheath and put it back after making a few whacking wind slapping moves through the air. Don’t get me wrong it was very fancy a$$ed wind whacking, but some fellas had orgasmic looks of pleasure on thier faces. So we felt like we were intruding on a personal moment and we took off to roam around the garden.


That’s when it happened. The wind got angry at those fellas and it began to twitch and cry and howl. It was mad as hell and wasn’t gonna take it anymore…they canceled the rest of that day’s festivities. I’m not saying it was those fellas fault, but talk about a co-winky-dense.


The rest of the a day was spent at the hotel, napping The next day we had planned to met and have breakfast with a dear internet. This is the surprise part! Hold your breath and squeeze your eyes tight, okay so just image your eyes are shut (otherwise you cann’t read this-duh)

We were meeting at  a Swiss Pastry & Cake shop (please note the word CAKE). Ha the nerve of them to NOT be open on a Sunday! Their loss. Anyways our secret dear internet arrived and we convoyed over to the what-a-burger. We had the best visit and what a darling she is, more loverly in person, if you can image, then online. Hey hold your horses, I’m getting there.

We talked of everything…writing, reading, world poy-tricks, medicine, music, movies, museums, traveling and we came to the utmost conclusion that to solve all the world’s problems we just need to love each other. I know CRAZY right? We chatted and laughed and laughed and chatted till time actually stood still. Then bam my dear internet wondered what time it was. Would you believe that we had sat there for like 6 ½ hours! Hey you would have too if you had the pleasure of meeting the one and only incredible Jai Joshi. I know don’t hate me. She is a very pleasant, intelligent and personable person. I only hope her mom will forgive us for keeping her so long.

Ya know she figured that we have been communicating online for at least 4 years, but most likely {wink} it’s been more like 5 or 6 Don’ t you think? Okay if you insist is a photo to prove I’m not making this up


TADAH

Oh this may look like the end of the story, but it’s not. Wait till I show and tell y’all about our-So lucky to be alive- trip home.

October 24, 2010

For Today and Tomorrow

Let me state from the get-go This is Not about ME, however I am foregoing a post today in the hopes that you will go here and read about these spoons. This is not a joke or a "gottcha" so in advance thank you


And thank you, as I'm not worthy of any of your special spoons.

October 20, 2010

Here we go again...

Oh sorry if you said you didn’t like this weird Virtual Museum Tour of mine, cause as I said in the first post of this tour…I wrote this and pre-posted it. That means in advance my dear internets. For this creepy month of October. Have I ever told y’all that Beloved and I were married this month? Yeah well we were and we are celebrating our 8th honeymoon! No I don’t know what we are doing, Duh! Pre-written, pre-posted. Remember? Part 1 is here and part 2 is here.

Warning, if you have suffered a recent loss of a loved one you may want to NOT participate in this Virtual Museum Tour. Gosh I hope I’m still with us.

Okay {cue some religious music}

We are now entering the Pope section of the museum. Yes this is much larger than I had thought too. Come on stay together now.


These are recreations, NOT the real thang people. Yeah, I seems a little unfair that this is the only religious sect in the museum, but what are we to do?


Yes this is a trick of the camera and reflections and my total awesome photographer’s eye.


Please remember these are fake exhibits. What I mean is the exhibits are real just the scenes are reproductions.


Okay here we are back to the regular death stuff. No as far as I know NO real bodies have occupied any of the boxes. That’s just creepy to think, Dorriane.


Here are some custom made coffins. Pretty cool huh? If you could have one, what would you want?


Here is an exhibit of ethnic origins.


A room scene that shows some of the customary symbolisms in celebration of Day of the Dead.


And here is a Japanese Hearse from 1972; the roof is copper and the painting was done by hand. Cool way to travel from death bead, to temple to crematorium.


Lookie inside


That’s enough for this visit. And next time some of our Presidents are passed on. No it’s true. Hope to see ya then.

October 16, 2010

Talk about Scary...

Recently Baby Girl said one of the moles on her back felt like it was poking her. So I took a look and um, didn’t like what I saw. See what I mean.


It took a week, but we got in to see the dermatologist. I felt so bad for Baby Girl on accounta she is so very, extremely modest and dermatologist look at you ALL over. Bless her heart. I getting there…

So Doctor wanted a biopsy, as I suspected she would. She was gonna do a slice of it and then went out the room, Baby Girl plied me question after question, I was calm and made light of the situation. She has hypochondriac genes, ya know IF she hears she may have blah blah symptoms she WILL. I did not lie, don’t do that to my kids and I got lucky she only asked about the procedure and not the what it means stuff. Okay so Baby Girl is familiar with biopsies she just didn’t make the connection.

Doctor comes back in the room, appears she had a change of heart and decided to do a core punch. Meaning she would take the whole mole. Okay that’s good then we don’t have to worry about keeping an eye on it and we could just get on with whatever was to come of it.

Baby Girl did very well with the procedure and was proud of herself and this - her first ever surgery and first every stitches. It didn’t hurt.


And now the results, ha your waiting was nothing like mine; think chest pains and if possible I got tons more gray hair. Normal. Did you hear that? The results are it was a normal ugly mole. Just keep an eye on the one on her upper outside thigh.

October 12, 2010

Let's begin here...

Last time we were here, and now well here we are again. Sush, quiet down don’t forget this is a serious Virtual Funeral Museum Tour. Okay stay with your buddy. It's okay Linda, you can pick a new buddy if your old one is not here. Are y'all ready?

{cue sad Christmas music}

Remember death does not take holidays. This would have been a kind touch to a grieving family.


Oh yeah, sorry I almost forgot. WARNING – if you have recently lost a loved one you may want to refrain from this October'ish tour. It’s not too late to turn back. Go ahead, turn back now.

{and re-cue music, something errie this time}

Crap look out, they are headless!


Eew, there’s that really creepy lady again


Yeah, I’m sure she's there. Don’t you see her? Right down there…in the chair


Cripies. Do I have to reach out and touch her, before you can focus. Someone has been hitting the bottle again. Haven’t they Deanna? Mmm hum.



Eww here’s the science stuff. Didn’t they used to cut off a finger or something to make sure one was, err gone? You know passed away, dead as a door nail. I knew you knew, Jai, you are smart like that. I know you are all smart. Stop quibbling we have a virtual tour to get on with.


Is that a ghost’s hand, holding that paper down in the glass case?


Check out this Johnny on the spot, embalming fella. Well he was there a minute ago


Hole-E, Toe-Mole-E, is that a mummy? No don’t touch it…


you crazy a$$ed Stephen. That's Gross!


Now we all have to go wash our hands. Yes all of us cause that was just gross. And I suppose I should wrap it up for this visit. We’ll pick up here next time, unless I you tell me you really don’t like this Virtural Funeral Museum Tour of mine. Well do ya?

October 8, 2010

Prolific Blogger

As stated and awarded by dear Deanna, who is a crazya$$ in her own write (not a typo); Thank you so much for this nifty-not yet – fifty award. Anyways there are strings, but not violin or heart strings. So… Why are there rules? IMO it’s because somebody likes being bossy, but it’s not me. Not this time. And here they are, the rules people not the boss.




1. Every winner of the Prolific Blogger Award has to pass on this award to at least seven other deserving prolific bloggers.

2. Each Prolific Blogger must link to the blog from which he/she has received the award.

3. Every Prolific Blogger must link back to the original post that started all this, it explains the origins and motivation for the award. And that would be Hazra, of Advance Booking.

4. Every Prolific Blogger must visit said starting post and add his/her name in the Mr. Linky, that way we all can get to know the other winners.

I hereby pass this fine and fancy a$$ed award onto the following

Yeah, yeah I’m playing by the rules…Again (said in Forest Gump style) Now on to an additional note, one of personal value I have passed 2 exams. And everybody (that would be you my dear, most dearest internets) says YEAH BABY! And the luffa shower was terrific!

TeaHouseBlossom

Positive Letters

Down River Drivel

Shine the Devine

Unedited

Left Brain Write

What’s in my Head

October 4, 2010

Are you ready?

October, the month of All Hollows Eve and to celebrate I’m doing a virtual museum tour for you, yes just for you my dear internets. Now for a warning – those of you who may have suffered a recent loss (death of a loved one) may not want to partake of this peculiar tour. Umm with that said I hope I haven’t either, beings how I’m pre writing this and pre posting it too boot. OH and this is photo rich.


{cue your typical car riding music, just whatever you like} Holler when you see 415 Barren Springs Drive, spooky street name…oooo barren oooo 415. Ah here we are, let’s park. Now everybody grab the person next to you, we are going to use the buddy system. Dapoppins! Hold your buddy’s hand or arm, NO pinching! Lucky for y’all I paid the entrance fee so you don’t have too. Not to worry I’m not gonna show you everything in case you decide you want to go all the way to Houston Texas so you can see this first hand for yourselves.


{cue creepy opera type music}

Everyone please watch your step, I don’t want any broken hips or bones (Lil’ Kelly) on my Virtual Tour. Please stay together and don’t lose your buddy.


Yes Aunt Amelia we will visit the gift shop, but not till we are finished, then we will shop on the way out. Now here we can see a lovely display in honor of our Police.


Hey check out this Hearse.


Did you see inside?


Look in this one…Boo! Don’t fall in. hahaha lol and chuckle


Here’s an old fashioned Hearse, Hey who let the horses loose? Georganna that is not funny! Okay so maybe it was, now put them back.


Now this one is creepy. A glass box sorta like the one Sleeping Beauty was "sleeping" {wink} in.


Stop making that creepy noise back there, this IS a museum ya know. Hey I said…umm, what, err who is that?

Great! That’s just great, it made me pee a little. Tour's over for today. What you want more? Okay so we’ll pick up next time right about here. Come on make sure you have your buddy we are all going to the restroom. Ah shut up, you know you peed a little too, humph.